"I’d like to tell you about my most intriguing bar. Actually, it’s not a bar, it’s art. Art of the highest order I might add. You see, I am a pompous artist with a particular vocabulary. I am also rich, a biracial bisexual republican, and a vegan atheist that is partially blind in the right eye. I love myself. Why wouldn’t I?"
So begins a beguiling press release we received last night, announcing that north Minneapolis' undead-themed bar Donny Dirk's Zombie Den would officially come back to life as Mr. Steven's Snuggery.
The transition was announced a little over a year ago (after Donny was, quite tragically, murdered). At the time, we reported that the Snuggery would be "a cross between low tech Godzilla and high-brow hookers (without the hookers) who are in love with outer space!”
Sounds like maybe that concept has changed, ever so slightly -- a little more literary, perhaps -- though it seems our Mr. Steven does want to save the world. Our cryptic host goes on to describe the parties he'll hold at his new hotspot thusly:
"A few will call these parties immersive conversational art pieces, I just call them a fun romp in the sack. If you enjoy quibbling among friends, strangers, and your new favorite enemy you will enjoy yourself. My favorite guests are librarians, teachers, political satirists and strippers because they understand me. They have better things to do than to become hastily offended. I hope Chomsky, MacKinnon, and Sowell show up. It’s important to be understood, don’t you think? But decision before inquiry seems to be the status quo, so nevermind. Due to my mission of saving the future, I only respond to loaded topics, tongue wars, lies, rants, secrets, and agendas. Come out of the closet."
(Here, we'll add that, unsurprisingly, Mr. Steven is related to Betty Danger and Psycho Suzi in Northeast.)
Anyway, how's that going to work? Well, two two-hour cocktail parties will take place on Friday and Saturday evenings (foreplay at 6 p.m., climax at 8:30 p.m.) beginning later this month. You can get tickets in advance or at the door, if any are left. "Cocktails and hors d'oeuvres are included because I am an excellent host," Mr. Steven promises, graciously. "My Snuggery will be open every weekend for your taste bud pleasure and conversational pain. Private Snuggery is also available."
Maybe you've gathered as much from all the info preceding this sentence, but one thing that hasn't changed since that first announcement? The Snuggery is still a decidedly R-rated venue.
“The ART of Intercourse and Penetration” opens April 20.
Mr. Steven's Snuggery
2027 N. Second St., Minneapolis