Nordstrom is selling an $85 rock, internet mock reviews it awesomely

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Sometimes you spot something for sale online and you have to wonder if that company is just fucking with you.

Case in point: Nordstrom is currently carrying a series of rocks, available in small and medium, priced $65 to $85. 

So what the hell do you do with this thing? Even Nordstrom doesn't seem to know. "A paperweight? A conversation piece? A work of art? It's up to you, but this smooth Los Angeles-area stone -- wrapped in rich, vegetable-tanned American leather secured by sturdy contrast whipstitching -- is sure to draw attention wherever it rests," states the product description.

The "product," which includes a leather half-case, is designed by Peter Maxwell, a Los Angeles-based leatherworker who sells bags starting at $600.

"Maxwell aims to create beautiful designs that embody both simplicity and functionality," the description continues, "and that develop rich character and patina over time."

While we're certainly curious as to who this product is intended for, something tells us the online reviewers aren't recent patrons. 

"Don't get caught unprotected if you run into a Goliath," Davidtheking writes. "Also great for impromptu stonings of local witches. Don't get caught unprepared."

Also, this rock might get you laid.

"It's a lady magnet," another reviewer claims. "You'll never be alone if you have this stone in the pocket of your pants."

You might even find enlightenment.

"This purchase has changed my life in so many ways," states Jb2017.

Sold? You can purchase your hipster pet rock here. It'll go well with your $130 "hipster nativity set."


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